When in Doubt…

“Then Gideon said to God, ‘Do not be angry with me. Let me make just one more request. Allow me one more test with the fleece, but this time make the fleece dry and let the ground be covered with dew.’ That night God did so. Only the fleece was dry; all the ground was covered with dew.” (Judges 6:39-40 NIV)

I doubt and question. A lot. I admit it. I am a doubter. Sometimes I feel like the church implies that doubting is a shameful thing. I actually don’t know the theology of this or related scriptures, but that’s pretty much how I’ve always felt growing up in the church. Who wants to be Doubting Thomas? It’s not like I want to have all these questions lingering. It’s kind-of built in me to question; that’s probably why I stuck with the sciences. You ask and ask, and sometimes you get the answer—but more often it just leads to more questions.

The dictionary definition of doubt is “to feel uncertainty about,” and questioning is the expression of that doubt or uncertainty. It’s this constant asking that has allowed me to see God move in crazy ways, kind-of like with Gideon asking God his request. And it’s all in my attitude. He knows when I’m asking sincerely and why I’m asking. Is it for me? Or is it so that more of Him can be revealed and shared?

I’ve had my “Gideon” moments, and every time without fail I walk away with renewed faith…and more questions. As a church, we read Judges months ago. Yet two things have stuck with me about the relationship between Gideon and God: In humility and honesty, Gideon requested that God show up, and then God answered and showed up. So ask away; God knows the desires of your heart and why you ask. And just like in science, the more you ask, the more can be revealed. Just be prepared that you’ll find yourself asking and seeking more.

Miel can be reached via email here. To see a larger image of the cartoon, go to https://pics.onsizzle.com/Facebook-The-Lamentation-of-Thomas-229366.png.